God … Everything or Nothing ???
It is cold. Tonight should be the coldest night, temp wise, of the week. Things will warm up a bit by the end of the week.
I departed early for NDG, praying that the trains would not stop during my transit. Thankfully I made it out and back with no disruptions.
We were a small intimate group.
Really, I go to a meeting to support the chair and to see where they will go on any given night. It’s a bit of fresh air to have a newbie in the chair this month, because we get fresh eyes on old and worn readings.
Taken from February 10th Daily Reflections …
“God is everything or else he is nothing. God either is or He isn’t, what was our choice to be?” A.A. pg. 53
I get a new pass at an old story. From a different perspective.
When I put down the drugs, I relocated. Therefore I did not go looking for drugs again. End of that story. During the last year of my drinking, there were days, sometimes weeks, or more matter of factly, nights, where I did not drink for one reason or another.
I never thought about coming back to the rooms, or ever going to look for them. Not until I was ready for them to appear. I never looked for God, but I knew where He was. During that last year, I don’t think I uttered a single prayer, until I needed to.
After all the signs pointing to the bitter end, I had an early heads up that it was coming. I was at work one day and I began to pray. For one reason or another, it just happened.
They say that we should not pray for things that we are not ready to receive. And I would add this … Be careful what you pray for from God because if He thinks you are ready for it, it’s gonna come, full force.
The last drink was coming. The dominoes were falling. I needed that hang over. I needed that last drink. And I needed a member to get me back in the door. One, Two, Three … God, it seemed, was listening, and I was ready to receive.
I had made my admission. I had surrendered. And I was taken in.
It took some time to clear my head and to stop feeling sorry for myself and to stop hiding from people, who found out I was sober long before I set eyes on them the next time, after my geographic escapade began.
God Is Everything.
My day begins with prayer. He is there, but if I don’t connect, I don’t get that connection to a power greater than myself. I HAVE to engage.
It took me a long time to figure out that God was going to give me just what I needed, on His schedule, and on His time. What I thought I needed or better yet, deserved, was tossed from the get go.
Now I pray for enough. That is all. I get what I need on any given day.
And I am grateful for that.
That’s why we go to meetings.
It was a good night.
More to come, stay tuned …