Friday … Snow, Realizations, Material Achievement
The other night I heard a man say that he wanted snow …
Well, we got snow. A lot of it. Piled up all over the place. However, the estimated final snowfall total, was a bit less than we expected, which meant that life did not come to a stand still because of snow.
That usually doesn’t happen here. We need a good snow fall to incite panic and travel stoppages on our streets. We haven’t had that kind of snow event, yet, this winter.
I saw lots of flowers, roses, bouquets, bottles of wine, being carried on the Metro from place to place on my travels tonight. Even though the weather was shitty going into today, people made the most of it.
Thankfully the trains were all running properly. However the buses were a bit slower than usual because of piled up snow. I imagine the plows will begin working this weekend.
We sat a largely male crowd with a sprinkle of women here and there.
The topic … Material Achievement.
By the time my father was in his forties, he had amassed a wife, two kids, a home with a huge yard, a riding lawn mower, a two car garage with two cars to to in it, and a pool.
We were living large. But it was still a competition to see who had the most toys and who would win. Sadly, my father did not have all the nice toys that some of our neighbors had, so he came in third place.
It seemed that alcoholism did not affect the attainment of wealth. It was part of that wealth. It came with the territory. A trade off, you might say.
In order to have nice things, you needed the alcohol.
Sad, that I am in my mid forties, and all I have to speak of is a husband, a 1 bedroom apartment, enough food in my fridge, a roof over our heads, and the rent payed on a monthly basis.
It’s not about money or wealth. We hear stories from the many about the evils of money and how money can’t buy you happiness. One story in particular, a friend of mine, over the holidays, has a good paying job, but he is a humble servant. Goes to see his family on Christmas, and is repulsed by the fact that the rest of the family thrives on Big Ticket Items and large sum money pot presents. You can tell, from his point of view that he cannot compete with his family on the money front. And he doesn’t want to either.
Alcoholism and drug abuse took too much from me. Twice in my lifetime I have lost everything that I owned because of alcohol and bad decisions.
On my slip, I moved my house and all of my wealth that was considerable to a new home. Which turned out to be the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. Because when it was over, the cops took me and on that day they told me that I could only take what I could carry and leave.
I left everything behind. My life, My things, Almost everything that I owned. Save for what I could carry with me.
Granted, coming into sobriety the second time, when I moved countries, I had a few boxes, a couple of suitcases, And that was it.
I remember those first few months living here, I thought I was entitled. how wrong I was. That began a journey of learning just how much I needed, how I was going to get it, and keep it, and make it work.
I went back to school. I worked my ass off for two degrees, that translated into NOTHING. I learned a lot, but what I learned served no one but the folks in the meetings and you here my readers.
I am not rich. We live simply and Spartan.
Coming from a life of having everything and more, and moving into a life where it took work, blood sweat and tears to get here, I don’t know if it seemed that it came so easily when I was a teen ager? For all the good things we had, there was that trade off … Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
I survived the great purge of 2013. We own what we need. We gave the rest to charity over Christmas.
We have the trinity of needs, and that is all …
The roof over our heads,
Food in the Fridge and,
A warm bed to sleep in.
And we are grateful for those things on a daily basis.
More to come, stay tuned …