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Joe and Charlie

Tuesday … Now, Later, Maybe and Never

friends becomeThe Up/Down temperature swings have leveled off, and today we swung into sunny, hot and moderate humidex readings. Thank God for Air conditioning. I was wise to load it up a few days ago, when they warned us that this trend would come.

When temps rise above 18c and above, things begin to get sticky. Living amid the concrete jungle, here in Western Downtown, cement and concrete buildings, warm during the day, then radiate heat when the sun goes down.

We aren’t insulated for seasonal hot and cold. This building is concrete and most apartments have windows across one entire wall, no matter what direction you face. We face West, which means, we get direct sunlight from 11 a.m. through till sundown.

That gets very warm. We get so much sun, that over the past decade or so, we had hung blinds, we papered or foiled the windows to turn sunlight away, these things did not help very much.

When we renovated the space a few months ago, we splurged on special sun sensitive roll blinds that work really well. They cut the heat quotient in a great way. With the added a.c. unit in the bedroom, we can maintain the apartment at a steady cool and comfy level.

It was so beautiful today, that I walked from the Metro to the church on the way out. (read: there was no bus waiting at the station, so I walked it).

It was our fourth year anniversary for the meeting today.

It’s very funny, our meeting.

They say, that all you need to have, to open a meeting, is a resentment and a coffee pot…

You actually need at minimum $350.00 to do it right.

And that is exactly how Vendome started. ONE pissed off alcoholic and his resentments.

Many years ago, well, four to be exact, Tuesday Beginners was in transition. We dropped from two meetings on a Tuesday Night, to just one. One of our members wanted the key and said he would operate the second meeting himself, in our space, inside our window of occupancy.

That idea was instantly nixed …

So he left, and along with my current sponsor, opened a brand new meeting right up against Tuesday Beginners, but half an hour earlier. Which put it smack dab in the middle of the Five o’clock shadows meeting at 5 and Tuesday Beginners at 7.

All three meetings are close. They are all on bus and Metro lines.

A couple of years later, I decided to leave Tuesday Beginners and followed my friends over to Vendome. By that time, the original member who opened the meeting copped another resentment with the group, and he fled. Which left us with a meeting to run and populate.

We were at Trinity for a little more than a year, then the N.D.G. Food Bank, was tossed on the street by their landlord, so they really needed a place to operate, because the food bank serves the entire N.D.G. and surrounding Burroughs. They came to Trinity.

Our meeting was tossed into the auditorium where the food bank had set up all around us, so we were sharing space with them, and several other meetings that book ended ours.

That did not go very well, and we ended up moving the meeting to where it is now. Up the hill and close to Villa Maria Metro and the 24 bus route. Sadly, most of the folks who used to come to Trinity, did not follow. We could never figure out the why? It was only 2 city blocks away.

We’ve maintained the group, albeit, by the skin of our teeth. We aren’t making seventh, hand over fist, and funds have fallen off because we can’t seem to hold over many people, they just don’t come week after week, however, we do have a small group of committed members.

Along with our anniversary today, one of our old timers celebrated 29 years of sobriety.

There was cake, and other goodies to feast upon.

We are closing in on the end of our Joe and Charlie Big Book tapes.

AH, I can hear the angels sing …

We have reached Steps Eight and Nine.

It is said that alcoholism is a three fold disease. Spiritual, Mental and Physical.

In steps One, Two and Three, we realize our powerlessness, we come to believe in a Power Greater than Ourselves, and we decide to turn it over. For many, this might be their first time around with (a) god. But many know who God is, and they have turned away for one reason or another. That solves our spiritual problem.

In Steps Four, Five, Six and Seven, we set to paper all those things that hold us back. Resentments, Guilts, and Fears. After an exhaustive, moral personal inventory, we clear away the wreckage of our pasts. Then we unload it upon someone we trust. We figure out from that inventory our character defects and our shortcomings.

It is also said that we continue to work Six and Seven for the rest of our lives.

That solves our Mental problem.

In Steps Eight and Nine, we make our lists of those we need to make amends to, and prepare to do so, as we are able, with this proviso …

An Amends list is not something to take lightly, depending on how much damage you have done to yourself and others. (read: Family, Friends, Employers etc …)

Many come to this point and balk. So Joe and Charlie give us this tool:

  • Make Four lists:
  • Those we can make amends to NOW
  • Those we could make amends to LATER
  • Those whom we could MAYBE make amends to at some point
  • And those we will NEVER be able to make amends to

Reading the text out of the Big Book, Bill covers almost every single situation that might turn up for someone working at this juncture of The Work.

Many an old timer took to the work slowly. But it is what it is. Amends cross many areas.

  • Personal
  • Business
  • Family and
  • Financial

At some point in ones sobriety, we should complete this list, in any way possible, because we drank, for some, in any way possible. And if we had to Beg, Rob or Steal it, alcoholics and addicts have done that. It may take a lifetime, but we only have ONE lifetime.

So we better make it a good life, in the end.

I’ve done these lists. There are people on each of these lists. With the dawn of sobriety the second time, I had to make amends to certain people, which I did early on, because I could.

When I got sober the second time, about a month in, I met those friends I ditched opting for a geographic, instead of honesty and respect. Those amends were made directly, face to face.

Let me tell you, that was not easy. It took everything I had to look my friends in the eyes and ask for forgiveness.

With the dawn of Facebook, I made amends to my friends whom I had not seen in many years. Many of my drinking friends, are sober themselves, so that made it a bit easier, because they were in the program, and the amends were mutual and went both ways.

There is one woman, a good friend of mine, who is still in my life today, who WAS in my life through every stage of my life in recovery the First and Second time.

We had THAT discussion.

She forgave me. But to this day, my heart aches, every time I think about her or see activity on Facebook, because I have unfinished business with her. You see, she was the only friend who was financially involved with helping to take care of me when I was really sick, my family had long since backed out of any responsibility or desire to help me.

And she carried me to my geographical move and then she left and went on to her own geographical cure. I was all the way OUT, she was only PARTIALLY the way out.

Life went on. But I owe her more than asking for forgiveness. One day I hope to make full financial restitution to her in my own way, for everything that she did for me. But I have yet to say these words to her, because they have been a long time coming.

Then on the final list, are those who I will NEVER be able to make amends to. Those are the people who walked out of my life for various reasons, (which are all about them, and not about me, but really, it is all about me no matter how you cut it).

I was an Alcoholic. I was Gay, I was living with AIDS, and I reside in Canada.

All these things are liabilities.

So fuck me for surviving…

We’ve come a long way over the last year or so. Each pass at the steps gives us perspective, insight and then the gift of hindsight. The greater the vision, the greater the effort to sober up.

We grow up when we get sober, and hopefully, we do it right this time.

Maybe NOW, Maybe LATER, MAYBE sometime, and sadly, quite possibly NEVER.

More to come, stay tuned …


Columbus was an Alcoholic … Maybe !

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Don’t you know you can only sail to the north east end of the Mediterranean sea, then travel by land  But what if we sailed in the other direction? Don’t you know if you sail out there your going to sail off the end of this sucker?

Columbus had to be an alcoholic, ” I believe the world is round, I do not believe that it’s flat,” then he made one of the most drunk statements the world has ever heard: ” I believe that we can get East by sailing West.” Now if that isn’t drunk thinking, I don’t know what is.

  • Many of his mannerisms indicated he was alcoholic,
  • When he left he didn’t know where he was going,
  • when he got there, he didn’t know where he was,
  • when he got back he didn’t even know where he had been,
  • but what really made him a real alcoholic is a woman financed the whole trip for him.
  • She did that twice.

Columbus followed a little formula, the world is always known, that if you want to change anything at all, there are certain things that have to take place. The first thing you have to do in order to change anything is to be willing to do so.

Circumstances are what make us willing.

Trying to find the new trade route to the East Indies, is what made him willing to change.

The second thing you have to do to change anything, is to believe you can do so. “I believe the world is round and not flat, and I believe you can get East by sailing West.” But his belief didn’t do him any good either cause he’s still standing on the shore of the ocean the day he expressed that belief.

Some days, weeks, months, years later, he did the third thing He made a decision. He said “by golly I’m gonna go find out that this thing is really round and not flat and can you really get East by sailing West,” but his decision didn’t do him any good either. Because he was still standing on the shore of the ocean the day he expressed that decision.

Some days, weeks, months, years later he did the next thing you have to do, he started taking action. The first thing he did he went to the king of Portugal to get the money, but the king was a very astute business man and said “there’s no way I’m not gonna let you have this money cause you’ll sail out there and sail right off the edge of this sucker and I’ll loose it all.”

That’s why Columbus ended up with the Queen of Spain.

Sweet talked her out of the money. On the promise that he would bring back gold, silk. spices and all the goodies of life. She gave him the money. He bought three ships, he put provision on those ships, he put crew members on all those ships And they began going East by sailing West.

Sailing West, day after day after day, now we don’t know for sure but we have a suspicion that on that first trip he hired a special sailor and put him on the bow of that lead ship at night with a lantern and he whispered in his ear said, “I believe this thing is round but if you see the edge of this damn thing, you holler so we can get turned around in time.”

Now after having sailing West for several days, he got results. They found land on the other side. Which was the result of the action that they had taken. Now we know that he thought that it was the East Indies, it wasn’t, it was the West Indies, but he’d proven himself that the world is not flat, it is round and you will not sail off the edge of it.

He turned right around and came back to Europe.

Went right back to the Queen of Spain, and she said to Columbus, “where are the gold, silk and spices you promised you would bring me?” And he said “sweet heart I’m sorry but I didn’t find any but he said, tell you what I’ll do, if you refinance me I’ll go back. Trust me honey please,” this time I’ll find it. And she refinanced him, and he got some more ships and more provisions, more crew members they begun sailing East by going West, but with one big difference, the second trip he didn’t hire that special sailor, put him on the lead ship by night, this time he went back on faith.

He went back on knowledge. The first time he went back on belief. you can’t start with faith, the only thing you can do is start with belief, make the decision, take the action, get the results, then you will have faith.

**** **** ****

I thought I’d start this post with this story. It comes from Joe and Charlie, speaking to the chapter in the Big Book called “We Agnostics.”

It was a beautiful day today. It is getting warmer by the day. It was also a great day because one of my best friends is here for 10 days for a work conference, all the way from California. It is our yearly get together. Along with a third friend who lives here, we make the three Musketeers.

What’s Behind the now “white door?”

The door I told you, the other day was blue, is now white. The space is a vacant cavern. When they built this store, they put in a glass wall that fronts the space. It extends all the way up to the Mezzanine floor above. That glass enclosure is now papered over.

I guess they don’t want to expose us to the transfer of the space to the new occupants. Yes, that is a true statement. New occupants are coming, and the signs say “SOON.”

I haven’t checked to see if they removed the outside signage yet, but I am sure that will take place very soon.

I went to the meeting, we had a good showing. The jobs are taken for the next month. I came home for a bit to write up the story above, actually I transcribed it word for word from the CD we are listening to weekly. It was just too good a story to let pass by and not note it here.

Then my friend from the states arrived at his hotel, down at Place des Arts and we went for dinner in the hotel, because it was too late to go find an open restaurant. Tomorrow we get a few more hours to go eat and hang out. Our third will be busy curling tomorrow night.

It is late,

More to come. Stay tuned …


Tuesday – Change – In Many Forms

maybeThe temperature right now, is holding steady at PLUS 6c. Change is happening.

The week began with positives yesterday, and continued through tonight. It will be an up/down mix hovering above and below zero for the rest of the week.

I can say that the snow pack that has been covering everything that stands still, is melting. It will be some time, yet, before all the snow has melted away. But I think that sub zero cold is finished.

Last night, we had dinner as usual, and after dinner I went into the bathroom to brush, and one of my teeth snapped in half. It was a good thing that it snapped where it did, because I haven’t had any problems with nerves or pain. This morning, I called my trusty dentist, who was dismissed from the clinic at the General, at her office across town. I see her tomorrow afternoon to extract what is left of the broken tooth.

I HATE the dentist. With a Passion …

Sunday, we were supposed to install new blinds in the living room. That did not happen, because we were not pleased with what Home Depot was selling. We have West facing windows that span the entire west wall of the living room and the bedroom. Currently there are no blinds in the living room, so we are getting sun, all day, well into evening.

The new HD tv is on its way. We had to rearrange our schedule to make sure someone was here if it came, alas, it did not. I did get a pick up slip in the mail, someone sent something that needs a signature. Something to do on the way home tomorrow after the dentist.

I departed on time and made my transit without any problems. My new Skets came in the mail yesterday. They were a big hit at the meeting. Well, after the meeting, because we can’t wear shoes upstairs in the bell tower, we have to wear cozy knitted booties, because of wet/snow/water.

Joe and Charlie took us through the second part of There is a Solution. In that reading, there are several asterisks at the bottom of several pages. They do not appear in the first editions, but they do, in subsequent editions. The asterisk calls ones attention to Appendix II – page 567 in the back of the Big Book … Spiritual Experience.

Twice during the read of There is a solution, you are asked to see, Appendix II, and a third time, you are asked … “Please, see Appendix II.”

The reading at the back of the book talks about change. It is known that Bill talked a lot. And when he talks, he likes to use analogies and stories that we will identify with. If Bill really wanted to make a point, he often repeated himself, over and over. Not only does he repeat himself, each time he does repeat himself, he uses a word, similar to the one he originally used, or the same type of word, to get a point across.

Most of what we heard tonight, centered upon the Spiritual Experience reading. Several times Bill speaks about change … you find “personality change, spectacular upheavals, sudden revolutionary changes, immediate and overwhelming God consciousness, transformations …”

He continually repeats the theme of change over several words. That is what is supposed to happen when we begin to get and continue to stay sober. Change.

In the back of the book, there are stories. In some of those stories, the spectacular upheavals and immediate changes take place for some, the so-called, “Lightening Strike” changes. The folks who came, came to, then came to believe, they changed and their lives changed in ways they could not imagine.

Other of us, took the more gradual, garden variety path. Many of us have been on this path in the long haul. Learning, listening, reading and working, change comes gradually over time. I am all for the long haul method. You often hear some of the old timers say:

Stick around until the miracle happens.

I heard that often, the first time I was getting sober. I did stick around for that period of time, and yes, miracles did happen. I stayed sober, but more importantly, I lived …

And I continue living …

Most of my friends, who are sober today, carry with them memories of spiritual experiences that have changed their lives, and for some, was the impetus to come back again. Some of my friends who did not stay, went back out and returned, were great teachers for me.

I also want to see God move for my friends, which is why I keep coming back. I decided that right now, this is where I should be. And spending inordinate amounts of time with my friends, will guarantee that if I stick around long enough, we will change. I want to watch my friends get sober. Because I see them change and I see God move for them, and they have spiritual experiences, which proves, that God does exist. For me at least. That may not be the same for you.

I’ve got plenty of time to be able to say quite confidently, God does move in our halls.

The other notable thought that came from the tape tonight was that when Joe got sober, he met Charlie. And being no so happy with himself, thought that he wanted to be someone else when he got sober, so he endeavored to be like and to become, Charlie …

How many of us are not happy with who we are and we want to be someone else?

When I got sober this last time, I was an empty shell. What I saw, and what I heard began to make sense to me, and from many people, I took things that I thought would be good for me. so you could say that in the last thirteen years, I’ve met many people, and today I am an amalgamation of all those people, in one way or another.

I got to create the man I am today, based on the example of the many I have come to know, over the years. I carried forwards, values from my family that I honor today, they have become my values, like love, family, honor, respect, dignity and so on. I’ve collected thoughts, sayings and practices from my friends that I practice myself today.

I’m not comfortable just sitting in a room collecting dust. I want to be In It to Win It.

Thankfully, all my guys are also In It to Win It. My sponsor makes that possible.

Change is possible, if only you give it a chance …

More to come, stay tuned …


Tuesday … Rambling About Many Things … Insight About Others

tumblr_lbphrtqohD1qbs0f7o1_500 noneedtoaskmynameCourtesy: The Gargoyle – Nothing like a little vertigo !!!

We thought that the weather was going to get better, tonight, it snowed. It was cloudy when we started the meeting, and there was inches of snow on the ground when we left. Tomorrow’s hopeful positive digit temp, has been brought down to a solid zero (0c) tonight.

As of late, children have been in the news, and not for good reasons.

In What the Fuck News …

The first case, a mother was convicted because she poisoned her son with salt, that eventually killed him, all the while she was blogging about his illness, prior to his death …

A second case involves a Muslim mother, (we know this because proceedings are having to be translated into Arabic) she beat and starved her two twin daughters to death. A gruesome story, and the other day the judge stopped proceedings to ask the mother Why did you do that ???

I mean, WHAT THE FUCK OF IT ALL ???

A third story involves “Free Range” parenting … Two small children, were allowed to walk to the neighborhood park by themselves. Because the parents practice “free range parenting.”

The police were called and the children returned home and six police cars followed, with C.P.S service workers to indict the parents for child neglect… Meanwhile, the kids are playing outside in the yard, unsupervised, and the neighbors are going MADDDDDDD ….

I’ll tell you a secret story about children …

When I was in grade school, we used to be bused to daycare after school, my brother and I. We did that for a long time, but at one point, I was like, NO MORE DAYCARE … In those days we had private bus service with door to door transport for our neighborhood.

I forced the driver, to take us home, instead of day care. I was probably not more than ten. This was in the 1970’s in Miami. After that day, my parents gave me a copy of the house key, and from that point on, both my brother and myself went home after school, forever more. Nobody noticed. Well, the spinster lesbian couple across the street knew we were there alone, and minded us if need be.

Nobody blinked an eye, there was no C.P.S issues. Who would you call (back then) to report two small kinds home alone for a few hours, until their parents got home from work? I learned responsibility, I took care of the house, I cleaned, I cooked, (we got our first microwave oven) that was a bit of excitement.

I understand the safety issues of allowing children to navigate neighborhood streets alone, in today’s day and age. There are too many perverts, and sickos on the street and you never know who is going to harass, or kidnap and kill your children if you don’t have eyes/hands on them 24 – 7 …

Let’s just leash them and let them wander around the yard aimlessly, or keep them locked in the house or at some day care center where someone can watch them while the parents can’t !

It is not the same world I grew up in … sadly !!!

I just had to get that off my chest …

I’m better now

So it snowed. We sat a good group. We finished Bill’s Story, via Joe and Charlie.

This is important, why?

I’ve spent thirteen years reading the Big Book, over and over and over. I worked my steps several times and I am in them right now. Last year, our Sunday night group, finished a cover to cover read through the book as well. That took more than a year of Sundays.

There are meetings all over the world, and I know that many meetings use the book as source.

You could go from reading the book, to reading a chapter, to reading a page, reading a paragraph, and finally, reading a sentence. Each chapter/paragraph/word leads into the next in a specific way. Each chapter has its job, to tell you something certain, factual. Which leads into the next chapter, which tells you something certain and factual, so forth and so on.

You could parse down to sentences and words.

For the last year, I have had the honor of working with sponsees. Each of them see me weekly, for a chat/read/discussion. Over the past year, I’m reading the book four times, at the same time, with four guys. Separately.

Like I said I’ve read the book. But it wasn’t until I read it with a sponsee, that words began to jump off the page at me as we read together. I saw things, and realized things, that I had not, in the past. I’m fairly certain, that after spending years reading the book myself, with others (in a group setting), I learned something. So that wisdom was in my brain,

The first section of the book hasn’t changed in over seventy five years, so after so many years, we should have been able to memorize the front of the book. I do know certain sections by rote. And I know the rest of the read, because I’ve read it so many times now.

Nothing will guarantee us sobriety, like working with another alcoholic.

I mean, that’s how it works, doesn’t it?

I am working with a new guy and he is concerned that I should be getting paid for what I am doing in the meeting, and in working with him. I don’t think I explained how that works very well. Someone has to get paid for working with others, he asked ? I gave him his Big Book, and stuff to read, on the side, (we give books to newbies) better they go home with someone, rather than sit in the box collecting dust.

Tonight we heard Joe and Charlie talk about these insights from the book, in the chapter called, “Bill’s Story.” The steps hadn’t been written yet, as the book had not been thought of when Bill got sober in the beginning. But in writing Bill’s Story, the steps are written out. He tells us the steps he took to get sober. Those steps originated in Ebbie’s witness of the Oxford Group, Ebbie told Bill about getting sober himself, and they worked through the One, Two, Three Shuffle.

Bill wasn’t having any of that Religion Shit.

But he came around when ( in squiggly writing ) the book says, “Well why don’t you find a concept of your own ?” With that statement, Bill got on board. He then tells us how he saw, and understood the rest of Oxford’s Steps and how he turned their short list of proposals, into the twelve steps as we have them today.

Funny how Bill negated all that religious shit, when he got sober, but as he sat writing the book, he had religious men, who were advising him on spiritual matters.

And that’s the God’s Honest Truth.

There are those issues that split many people along fracture lines.

  • Religion
  • God
  • Spirituality
  • Faith
  • Practice

The concept of God is problematic. God is problematic. So find your own, but there lies the contradiction between the Big Book, and As Bill Sees It.

It reads: “You can find a concept of your own, whatever works for you is good, then the reading goes on to say, all that is well and good, but in the end it always comes back around to God.”

Well, fuck me sideways on Tuesday !!!

When we get sober, we get new hearts, new eyes, new livers, and new lives. The longer you stick around you get to polish the temple of God we inhabit and so on. The longer you stick around, the more we learn, and that knowledge comes to bear when we sit down with another alcoholic, and do The Work together.

It can be that good !!!

More to come, stay tuned …


Tuesday … Much Better than Monday !

tumblr_ln3takPnYT1qemrxpo1_500 dyingwontkillyou

Courtesy: Dying Won’t Kill You

Today it was much warmer than it was yesterday (it is still cold) and last night. As I said over the weekend, things would get worse, before they got better. With the wind chill last night, temps dropped to Minus (-26c) over night. It was windy, and brutal. The shelter buses were running all over town gathering the homeless to take them to sites that had beds for them.

And I actually heard one of them say, on the news last night, that “some homeless folks won’t take shelters up on a warm bed and hot food and coffee, because of pride, and obstinacy.” Sadly, they would rather sleep in a snow drift, or in a cardboard box, or under a bridge instead.

The metro platforms across the city are choice sleeping sites because they are warm, BUT they aren’t open all night, and will eventually have to be vacated, so they end up outside in any case.

No matter how hard we try to work with those who have nothing, some choose having nothing rather than accept help. Kinda makes you throw up your hands …

All the snow that fell in the previous week, has turned to ice. They have not plowed several streets near home or in NDG tonight. So all those snow drifts that exist, are now ice castles. it was a dangerous trek tonight, with sidewalks and streets covered in ice, and then snow fell this evening to top it all off … This cold snap continues through the week, and we will see minus twenties again.

After my Sunday event of trying to get from home, to the church and back home with dry feet failed, I had to do something. My favorite pair of boots failed on me again. I had a hair appointment Monday afternoon. Afterwards I went to “The Tire” to check out pro style rubber boots. I must say that they aren’t cheap. Fifty dollars later I had a pair of my own.

I had a conversation with a friend last night and told him about my trek and purchase, and I learned something from him … “Never let your feet get wet and cold” because that will kill you fast !

I’d never heard that before. But I never had a problem with wet socks and feet up until now. I always managed to get around slush puddles well. It was just terribly bad on Sunday. They had cleaned up that mess overnight, don’t know how they did it, but the puddles were all gone today.

I made the trek out this evening. When I got to the other end, it was slip and slide all the way down the hill to the church. People were lined up like penguins following each other step for step, managing the slick ice covered sidewalks.

We began a 35 week survey of the Big Book, with Joe and Charlie. Joe and Charlie are two sober members that host Big Book Weekends. I don’t know if they are still alive today, but we have the tapes, nonetheless. Once you get past the southern accents and the drawl speaking, and some don’t, they go over the book section by section. But they don’t just go over the book, they tell stories around the section of the book they are on.

Reading a book on any given subject is good. Going to university to learn about a topic or subject is good. You have a book to read, lectures to hear, and papers to write in the end. But I found over ten years of study, reading books that lie “around” my subject was also a good decision.

I have all kinds of books in my library that touch on many areas of let’s say religion, or theology, or spirituality … and on and on. Then I have books that I’ve collected that I have read to broaden my reading into other, familiar areas. I call that “Side Literature.”

The Big Book, is a stand alone read. It tells us about the problem, what doctors and others say about the problem, as it pertains to them, then it tells us the method on how to get sober, and offers a solution to our three fold problem, that being bodily, mentally and spiritually.

You can get sober if you read the book, hopefully with another set of eyes, to help you along. I’ve been reading the book for more than thirteen years, and to this day, every time I read from it, something new comes to light, even if the words are still that same.

Over the past couple of years, I’ve read all the historical books: A.A. Comes of Age, Dr. Bob and the Good old timers, Language of the heart (Grapevine articles), and Pass it On.

Aside from the main story told in the Big Book, the “side literature” speak about all those involved in the very first years, decades into today. It is good reading. The broader view of the main players in the fellowship give insight to how it all happened.

Now I listened to the first section of the tape tonight, and I heard the guys talk, and I knew what they were talking about and the who, what, where and why, because I added the side literature. This is all added knowledge for the guys I work with.

For a long time, I skimmed the surface. And that was sufficient to a point. And I thought tonight, that yes, I read the books, worked my steps, and did all that was told to me. And that was all well and good, again, for a while …

But I witnessed people doing something different, and I wanted to do it too. And I stepped up and joined the party going on around me. I went to round ups and listened to new people tell me how they did it, and what happened because of that work, again, I wanted that too. So I stepped up my game, and I did what they told me to do, and that made all the difference in my life.

There is a wealth of information to be had, if you know where to find it. All those books you see on the literature table at any given meeting, are meant to be read, not just meeting decoration on a table nobody really pays attention to. Yet we put it out at every meeting.

Pamphlets and literature are what keeps up going in between meetings.

This is merely a suggestion … Read the Books.

A new study method was introduced tonight. Not everyone was pleased with that choice. Hopefully they will come back for more, because this is a long haul project.

A good night was had by all. More to come, stay tuned …

It was a good night. More to come, stay tuned …